Moments of despair | 22 July 17

I have this crippling fear that I won’t be able to be with my children as they grow up and become beautiful adults. I’ve noticed that the devil uses any way to throw this fear in my face. Sometimes it’s SO obvious that I actually laugh and just remember that my God is greater! Just last night I had someone prank call me. I have never had this happen and didn’t understand it whatsoever. I received 20 calls within a couple of hours during the night. Two text messages and several voicemails. Threats and lies. I became hysterical and let my emotions take over. I did not pause to pray. I did not pause at all. I was in complete panic and was shaking uncontrollably. I was absolutely horrified that my children could be taken away from me. Once the night settled, I prayed and I knew this was some sort of an attack. I knew that I was pulling away from God and I just needed to have every part of me peacefully given to him.
I am alive. I am okay. My children are alive. They are okay. My husband, family, home, everything… is here. And safe. God is here, his angels are here, we are okay.
My husband says I “snowball” when it comes to certain things and I totally do. I hope to gain control over it as I become more aware. Please pray that God would help me to pause in moments of despair and just remember his faithfulness and who he is.


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